As of my last nightmare, just now, I am dropping any thoughts of getting my insurance to pay for my mental health treatments. There is no time to wait. I need rest. I need peace. I can’t be frightened in my sleep. Again. 30 years is enough. Actually, one week was enough.

I’m somewhat ready for this. I’ve not had insurance pay for anything related to my mental health for over twenty years.

I’ve paid out of pocket this entire time because the health insurance I’ve had never me schedule appointments closer than two to three months apart. And when I got an appointment it is was with a psychologist and not a psychiatrist.

During my five years in Las Vegas I paid $250 for every half hour appointment I had with a psychiatrist. This ECT thing will be far, far more costly.

It seems that ECT is not a one and done, instead, it requires multiple treatments, perhaps ten or more, all in a hospital surgery room setting.

Tens and tens of thousands of dollars, I am sure.

Tomorrow I will call my psychiatrist in Las Vegas to set in motion whatever needs to be done.

I may wind up pushing a grocery cart but I will be a grocery cart pusher without nightmares or chronic insomnia. Or less of this, right? Right? It’s going to work, right? Hmmm.

I wonder how many people Intermountain (internal link) and Humana and every other health care group kill because they won’t pay for mental health treatments. They say mental health is important but none of them want to pay for it.

And none of them will take the blame for the ever increasing suicide rate. They talk about people stigmatizing those with poor mental health when in fact they do it more than anyone else.